The Black Informant | African American Commentary, News and Community Building

Am I the only one that thinks this guy is a fool? Why not put $20K down on a house? By the way, I’m getting married in the spring and I just bought and remodeled a house with my Fiance. So you can say that WE spent approximately $200K on OUR engagement but we have a much more tangible memory. Where’s Oprah?

There is a term for folks that are NOT wealthy but spend their money in such a manner; “Ghetto Fabulous”!

If this dude needed to save up the money to do this it means he spent money that could have been put to better use for his and HER future. But I guess it is more important to put on a good show for the here and now.

The number one cause of divorce in the USA is $$$$. There is no quicker ticket to a failed marriage than money problems in the relationship. People are more willing to deal with infidelity than remain in a marriage were the money is F–ked up.

My wife and I have been together for a total of 18 years (ten married). When we got married we were both making very good money and had a good deal of savings. Thank GOD! Because when those medical bills (insurance dont pay for sh*t) started coming it was nice to have a nest egg to keep our heads above water and our credit in good standing.

YES, sh*t does happen and you need to be prepared for it! That is why I would advise anyone thinking about blowing a relatively large sum of money on an “special event” to consider if they might actually NEED that money for something very real (and possible unexpected) in the future.

Living below your means is very satisfying! It frees you from a great deal of worrying and stress. It is a good feeling to get layed-off and not have to worry about money ( I have also been there before).

MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS!!!. I had a modest wedding and we still got divorced. We were done paying for the entire event before the dj played the last record. Glad to see men that feel the need to do grand gestures.

So Saudia,

Would you spend twenty thousand of your own dollars like this?

You say it is a grand gesture, but is it a smart one?

Look, I have seen and particpated in many weddings, big and small, expensive and modest. I can respect the well to do who have it like this and are willing to display it. I do not respect modest folks that go into deep debt for a wedding day. These are the ones that usually end up divorced, it is a clear indication that their prorities are out of wack. It just like the girls that turn down a proposal of marriage because they think the ring is too small.

The way I see it far too many black folks have ZERO concept of what a successful or happy marriage should be. Since they do not come from home with married parents they are clueless as to what to expect when they get married.

Because so few other folks will be married around them they will recieve many negative influences encouraging them to end their union.

Many folks I know are incapable of remaining married because they are too focused on taking care of their mothers and other family memebers to the detriment of their marriage.

I get your point about not going into debt for an event that only last a day. However, black, white red, blue most people make bad decisions when it comes to money matters. If this fool wants to spend 20 grand on this I say good luck to them.

I was in awe of this proposal when I first saw it last year. But on further review, all I can do is shake my heard. Has this guy lost his mind? All of that money on a proposal. They better stay married for a long time.

Reading through this blog, it bothers me that you don’t know this man, however you are calling him a fool. You can say that his choice was unwise, but at least call him by his given name. Next, all have been hurt by someone, and left a bit damaged. If we are honest with ourselves, we seek that one person to make us feel special, that we are valuable, wanted and needed. We don’t know what they have been through in their lives. He did something that we should all do, he sought God’s instruction on what to do. Where God guides he provides, so if that’s what he was instructed to do, then so be it. Because he was obedient, he will get that 20K back plus some. He’s not asking any of you for money or assistance. He didn’t do it for recongition, he did it because he wanted to let the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with just how much she meant to him. If you can’t say anything nice, then don’t say anything at all!