Neil Brown
(excerpted)
Sphere: Related ContentI wonder why people often hold me to a greater level of responsibility in this walk, when we all have to walk? I wonder why people get disappointed in me when I don’t live to certain expectations. After all, whose expectations am I supposed to meet— theirs or God’s? And when I become disappointed in them, why do they act like they’re, “Only human,†and that they’re supposed to mess up? Very confusing sometimes…
I want people to understand that the way of the Christian walk is not not a social one for Sunday afternoon tea, but, rather that it is a lifestyle. It is not a hobby, as a friend repeatedly tells me. When you see me at Wal-Mart, I’m in lifestyle. When you see me at the movies, I’m in lifestyle. When you see me buying groceries, I’m in lifestyle. When you see me at church during the week, I’m in lifestyle. When you see me shout in the Spirit in worship service, I’m thankful for my lifestyle because I know I’m not changing it for you or anybody else.
And, even though I struggle, I am learning how to be completely content in all my present situations. For greater is He that is in me, than He that is in the world.
The thing that really disturbs me is the fact the people won’t leave it alone. I know for a fact that people are discussing my love life and wondering why I’m not dating. Sister So and So would really compliment him and a good wife. You think he’s… Oh No! He couldn’t be, not the reverend! You think? Rumor has it that Choir Directors are usually. Shocking isn’t it? But I get all of that! Here’s what I’ve dying to tell church folk: MY LOVE LIFE JUST AIN’T YOUR BUSINESS!!!!!!!!! Let me talk about your love life or something else terribly private to you. I mean, is there nothing that you will not talk about? Everything else I have talked about or preached about. My love life and my bedroom is just off limits to you. (You will note the period at the end of the sentence, for it also metaphorically means period!). I am single. Never been married. Ain’t trying to rush into it either. I know that scares some of you to know that there is a minister with no wife about town and all these single good lookin’ young ladies! But I also know how to protect myself. NO ONE can point to, look back on, or drum up a scandal on me and young ladies with shady behavior.
Don’t test me, I know my reputation.
So for those of you who don’t know me real well, let me help you:
I do not date within the congregation. The church is not a candy store to me. I do not look for different flavors, or new additions to the existing line. And if, in the event there is a young lady that catches my eye and peaks my interest, I have enough sense to speak with my Pastor about it. Because not only do I understand accountability, but he doesn’t need things to get out of hand either for his own credibility. I’m not jacking my Pastor up either. So know now, I talk to the pastor first, that means before I approach the young lady.
It’s too easy for dating to affect my ability to minister in my church or anywhere else when things get “high schoolâ€. I’m not in high school anymore, I graduated. There is not a time that you will find me alone with a young lady unless I’m on a date. That does not mean that I’m going to make phone calls for potential chaperones. I know how to treat a lady. How often I date, ain’t your business! But I will tell you that it is not often. But that should not matter you, it’s not you dating.
Please don’t take this to be some angry rant, it’s not. I’m a preacher, I’m just confessing what most of us won’t. I’m not angry about this, but please, my love life?? Read the Song of Solomon or catch a soap opera. (Click here to read more [if this link does not take you directly to the article, search for article named “A Preacher’s Confession”)
